Photoshopping Thanksgiving

Hello IGWers,

Today I bring you a sad state of affairs. I am of course reporting of the ill-conceived notion of photoshopping peoples heads on turkeys to appear humorous. Not only does photoshopping human faces on turkeys a stupid idea, it lacks very little humor. Makes you cringe more than laugh. I wish I knew why people didn’t think of original Thanksgiving jokes. This is the bottom of the barrel. It is in fact so bad that I would rather buy a bunch of Circuit City gift cards for Christmas than stomach any more of these lame jokes.

To more innovation gone wrong!

Hondo

arnoldturkey

turkey-head-bush

Man Caves or Mantuary

Hello IGWers,

In order to prevent struggles as large as those from the Cold War, men throughout the United States and the world are coming together. They are banding together to support their man caves. The definition of a man cave is as follows: a section of a dwelling devoted to manly activities and relaxation.

Man caves have excited since ancient times. Yet the emergence of technology has had a profound impact on the modern man cave. Today’s man cave consists of a gigantic television, laptop computer, cell phone, guitar, air hockey table, pool table and favorite chair or coach. The temperature of a man cave is a well-regulated item. There is speculation that today’s man caves are regulated more strictly than global warming.

There are few violations in the man cave. However, a few do come to mind. The first is the playing of the movie The Notebook. The second violation includes the lack of snack food. The third violation of the man cave is lack of music or video output. Violations of the man cave are defensible in the international man court without trial by jury.

This is only speculation, but many of today’s celebrities have had to resort to the man cave. Examples include Bill during the Monica trial, Kobe during the Colorado incident, and me when I started blogging. You know that these individuals had to deal with some big stuff forcing them into the man cave.

Other individuals have chosen a life in the man cave. You see or hear little from these men, but rest assured they are rising their sitcom IQ and rising the caloric intake of the entire nation. There is also much evidence to suggest that these individuals have an over-abundance of innovation gone wrong products. Some examples include: novelty tape decks, the beer hat, gigantic foam fingers, novelty college symbols and of course ancient computers (Compy386).

Below is an example of a man cave from CNN.

Full CNN article available at http://www.cnn.com/2008/LIVING/personal/05/02/mantuary.marriage/index.html.

To more hilarious man caves!

Hondo

Counting Sheep is Inferior

Hello IGWers,

As a public service announcement, I am declaring that counting sheep is no longer valid. A test was conducted in 2002 at Oxford University and they said that counting sheep was clearly inferior. My guess is that after this test the desirability of the counting sheep was greatly diminished allowing Serta to dominate the market with their advertising campaign.

It turns out that thinking about waterfalls and the beach will put you to sleep much faster.

I imagine that they tested a number of things before they settled on these two things. Here is what would put me to sleep even faster than the beach.

1. Pauly Shore movies- Does this need an explanation?

2. The barometric pressure channel

3. Family Matters

4. Reading the dictionary

5. The blue screen of death

6. CMT

7. Martin Lawrence films

8. Kinoki footpad commercials

9. E True Hollywood Story- Bobcat Goldthwait

10. America Can’t Dance Season 14

Hopefully you can catch the necessary zzzs.

Hondo